Let There Be Light

 It's in the moments of helping my husband when he's helpless, cleaning up after the mess of 3 little's, and the needs of serving my family that I say "O God I'm not sure if I can keep doing this" and He says "yes you can dear child, just one single moment at a time."  Do the next thing, the dishes, laundry, meal times and life continues. When I look too far ahead it's daunting but how many times over the past few weeks God has reminded me that I'm here today and not to worry about tomorrow.  I probably have repeated myself a lot in these blogs but I'm preaching to myself every time that I write, it's more meant for me then you to be honest. It's been a healing outlet for me to be able to write and put it all down in words. I've made a binder and titled it "Look what the Lord Has Done for Us." I've printed all our blogs so far and have put all the beautiful cards we've been given in the binder; it's such ...

  I was talking with someone the other day and discussing the subject of death.  How our society is terrible at talking about this topic. We plan for our retirement, we plan our finances for the future but we never plan for death. Not many people talk about their wills, making sure they have life insurance and prearranging their funeral because that will never happen; especially at our age. If one thing in this life is for sure, it's that we all die no ifs ands or buts. So why don't we talk about this part that actually is so important.  I believe we have an enemy who doesn't want us to think about it and wants us to live our lives as "that will never happen." Because when we start to talk about death we have to start searching,  "is there a God? is there life after death?"  If the answer to that question is 'yes' then our life needs to change and living is no longer about us but for the glory of God. I don't know if I'm morbid but I thin...

  There's something so very humbling about walking this journey and I've been in a state of grief this past week. The grieving of starting a new chapter; that our lives will never be as they were, the grieving of starting chemo and not knowing what that will look like, the grieving of sending our kids back to school when I anticipated having them home this year.  There's so many things in our life that have been stripped away and surrendered to the Lord. Letting go is a process and has been heartbreaking for me this past week. All the things I once thought our life would be or look like have totally changed in the last 6 months. We never thought in a million years we would be walking this road full of pain and heartache yet full of joys like we've never known before.  Coming to the reality that we can't and won't be able to do everything. It's been humbling being on the receiving end of needing help instead of giving it. We can do nothing else but say "...