Two Worlds

As the Christmas season is upon us many emotions run through our minds. Setting up the tree was beautiful but also had sorrow, will Jesse be here next Christmas? Why does this have to be so hard, Lord? We really are living in two worlds and it's a strange thing to balance. In one sense Jesse is feeling so well and normal that our life is normal(which is such a blessing.) But on the other hand, heading to appointments, stepping foot in Juravinski for follow ups with specialists, being told the chance of cure from this is very rare...it's kinda like a gut punch every time we hear those words . We should be used to those words by now but it never gets easier. Yesterday we had a follow up with the colon specialist. The first time we met with her she was very optimistic and wasn't sure that the spot on Jesse's lung was cancer. But yesterday she said that it definitely was cancer and because of that less options are open in the future such as surgery to remove the primary tumor in his colon.
I don't think we ever knew how much of an emotional roller coaster this journey would be. But as I think upon it all I'm reminded of Jesus and His short time here on earth. What an emotional roller coaster He had to live. At the same age as Jesse, 33 Jesus went to that cross for our sins. He really did live in two worlds in a sense also. He knew what His life was like in heaven with His Father prior to coming as a baby. He knew what a world with no sin and brokenness was , yet He was here in this broken world.  He knew that He would give His life for our sin. What a contrast to be living in those two majorly different worlds for Him.

As I ponder this time of year and the state of our world, if we're honest we all have struggles that we're dealing with and that's where Christmas comes in. Jesus came so that we could have hope amidst the chaos of life and our broken struggles. He came so that when things seem so bad and impossible that we could cling to His sweet promises that never change. For the first time I feel that I truly understand why He came and have a greater appreciation for Christmas. This Christmas would you put your hope in Jesus? For the mountains may be removed and the hills may shake, But My lovingkindness will not be removed from you, and My covenant of peace will not be shaken," Says the Lord who has compassion on you.- Psalm 54:10 This world is going to continue to be shaken but you can know the One who's covenant of peace will not be shaken. Jesus will return one day, as the people waited for their Messiah at His first coming as a baby we need to be eagerly awaiting His second coming. Waiting and ready, telling all about the hope that we have in Him.  Eternity awaits us, o and o what a glorious day to meet Jesus face to face when we've put our trust in Him.

Jesse will continue with his chemo treatments, Vitamin C infusions and hypothermia until his next scan in February when we will reevaluate again. God has been so faithful to us along the way. The other day we were surprised by a meal and letter from someone. They have chosen our family to do 12 days of Christmas for. Each day they anonymously drop off a gift and letter for us. One of the gifts was a pair of socks and they talked about Hebrews 12: 1-2 : " And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith." What an awesome idea to bless someone!

We wish you all a very Merry Christmas! How I wish I could send each one of you a Christmas card and give you a hug for all your support and prayers this past year.  May you take time to sit in His presence and enjoy the real meaning of Christmas. To be present with your families and put all the distractions away.

Love,
Jenn and Jesse

A few songs that have been on repeat this past few weeks:

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